Thursday, July 10, 2014
Last week we celebrated Independence Day here in the US – the birthday of America’s freedom; or as the online dictionary states: the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint. It’s such a blessing to live in a country where we have these (and many other) freedoms. So, are you truly living a life of freedom? Are you acting, speaking, and thinking, as you want? Without hindrance or restraint? I ask this because although we absolutely can live “free” lives, I find many people do not. Instead, they live their life as prisoners of their own limiting beliefs and their own fears.
Often times clients come to me for coaching when they get tired of feeling stuck in their lives or careers; they feel like things are no longer working as they currently are but don’t know what to do to get “unstuck”. What keeps most people stuck are their own belief systems. The thoughts and beliefs that tell them they “have to stay in a job they don’t like because they need to pay the bills”. Really? Is a job you don’t like the only way you can pay the bills? How about a job you like? That will also pay the bills.
I also hear people say they can’t get out of a dysfunctional relationship because they’ve “been in the relationship for 10 years and have a child and can’t imagine life with anyone else.” How about life in a functional loving relationship? Can you imagine that?
The answer is yes; they can imagine a job they like and/or a loving happy relationship but don’t know how to get there – they are afraid to do what is necessary to make a change. So, instead, they live a life that feels anything but free. It makes me sad for them because I used to live a life (both personally and professionally) where I felt anything but free. I felt stuck and scared and didn’t know how to change my situation. Eventually, through some deep reflection and with the help and support of family, close friends and a wonderful coach, I figured out how to stop letting my limiting beliefs keep me from living the life I wanted to live – one where I not only felt free to act, speak, or think as I want, without hindrance or restraint but also one that felt, and feels, incredibly fulfilling. Often times, I am lucky enough to work with the people who feel stuck and scared; I am able to help them figure out how to create the life they imagine and get through the fears and limiting belief that hold them back.
Freedom is much more than living in a country that believes in and allows us freedom to be, act and choose as we wish but is about freeing ourselves from whatever is keeping us from living our most fulfilling lives. If you’re feeling stuck and as if something is holding you back, the first thing to do is acknowledge it and know it’s okay. Acknowledging when things aren’t right is the first step. Then, know you are meant to live a life that is fulfilling and one that is not hindered by limiting beliefs and fears. Work through those limiting beliefs and fears (or get support to help you do this) so you can truly be free and live the life you are designed to live — one that is fully satisfying and successful and enables you to celebrate the freedom of your life just as we celebrate America’s freedom on the Fourth of July.